Illegal aliens entering from the North, too

What about illegal aliens and/or terrorists entering the United States through the Northern border?  We don't need to put all our border patrol eggs into the Southern border basket.  But just for a few minutes let's lighten up and have a few laughs at the criminal invader situation.  As the saying goes, "all work and no play, makes Americans, well, dull."  ha  Filed under 'humor, satire, liberal spew'.

I want to know why the government seems so concerned about the flow of illegal Mexicans, but barely gives a glimpse north — where Les Habitantes are massing.

Who will stop this vast horde of conniving Canadians, desperate to steal our jobs and get a taste of forbidden freedom?  What does the northern border get? Three new port-a-potties and a drug-sniffing raccoon named Mindy.

I fully believe that the Canadian border should be a priority, not an afterthought.

Canadians can creep from tree to tree with no chance of being spotted from above. And by above, I mean by an agent perched on top of the tallest tree he can find; all the air support is in the South.

Also, once the Canadians are in our country, we can't discriminate against them based on skin color, because they look just like us.

Police can't just pick up all the Caucasians in Clinton County and truck them to the border. At least not in one trip.

Sure, if you trick one into speaking you might catch the accent and can demand a green card, but I'm told that Canadians from outside Quebec might not even have the accent.

That isn't dangerous?

Worse yet, once the Canadians get in here, they're not satisfied with the jobs we don't want to do. They won't happily pick fruit or clean houses or dig ditches. They want to be middle management. They want to be civil servants. They want to be columnists.

Once they have our jobs and they're fully integrated into our society, they'll start to make changes. Changes we won't like.

They'll spread universal health care, pastries and hockey wherever they go. Football will be replaced by curling. Police cars will be replaced by horses. Spring will be replaced by three more months of winter.

They'll try to install a puppet government, with a prime minister and parliament and viceroys and grand poobahs.

They'll force everyone into gay marriages. And no, I don't mean happy marriages.

So what can North Country natives do to stem the tide of illegal immigrants from the Slightly More North Country?

We can organize our own Minuteman vigilante patrols. We have plenty of gun-toting patriots willing to give up some free time to secure our borders. Deer and duck hunting seasons will continue to be limited, but Canuck hunting season will have no restrictions.

We can build a wall along the border. It will have to be high enough to dissuade climbers, say 75 feet, with broken glass across the top, and cover 5,000 miles or so.

Assuming we can get the people in the Pacific Northwest to start out there and meet us halfway, I think we can get it done by Friday. Shaving 100 percent off school funding and Medicare should be enough to fund it.

Until the wall can be built, however, we'll simply have to outsmart them.

We'll catch them with specials on cheap liquor at the duty-free stores, or we'll set up faux gas stations offering gas for 79 cents a liter (that's like 20 cents a gallon to you and me).

We'll lure them in with a discount Rocket Richard memorabilia store (autographed, sweat-stained athletic supporter, only $87!) at the border, then launch them back over the partially built wall with a catapult.

As a last resort for locals, we could start our beloved bridge to Vermont in Canada instead of Plattsburgh, at least keeping the aliens off New York soil.

We'll work on keeping the border to Vermont secure later.  By Steve Ouellette source

Now for serious criminal invader posts:

Disaster Looms

The Senate is poised to pass S. 2611 this week, the giant amnesty bill that would change the demographics of our country and start us on the slide into rampant crime, drug culture, and third world poverty. Every thinking American is needed at this moment to phone, fax, or visit their United States Senators and oppose this legislation. (From American Daughter)

From Double Barrelled Opinions:

American working in Mexico

I received this in an email this morning...

The following from a director with SW BELL in Mexico City.
I spent five years working in Mexico. I worked under a tourist visa for three months and could legally renew it for three more months.

Red Sky Brothers has video and commentary you must see, so go visit them:

While this video is not professionally done, it is right on target. The bullet points expressed within are exaclty what the United States policy SHOULD be.

Video is done by members of Americans for Legal Immigration.

Linked with:

From Free Constituion "unAmerican Fencing" 

Apparently, those in our government not immediately accountable to the people are dead set against the idea of real border control. From tipping off Mexico as to the Minutemen's whereabouts, to President Bush's reluctant support for enforcement and border security, the United States government has largely acted in favor of open borders.

From the Houston Chronincle:

AUSTIN - U.S. Ambassador to Mexico Tony Garza described building a fence along the U.S.-Mexico border as un-American in a speech to the University of Texas at Austin graduating class Saturday night.

From Common Sense America, " Liberty and Amnesty for All"

How many possible ways can our Senators define amnesty?  Well, apparently they have already found at least 31 ways.

From The Washington Times

Among those who will be cleared of past crimes under the Senate’s proposed immigration-reform bill would be the businesses that have employed the estimated 10 million illegal aliens eligible for citizenship and that provided the very “magnet” that drew them here in the first place. ...

From Committees of Correspondence, "I want to cut off the head of the Democratic party and drive a stake through it"

As enticing as that sounds, I would prefer a constitutional ammendment to section 2 of the 14th Ammendment

From  Double Barrelled Opinions  "Mr. President, please get this crap out of my back yard"

Illegal Aliens Guilty of Sex Crimes.
Here's a clipping from my local paper. Please read carefully, especially the last line where is states both men are illegal aliens. This underscores why we need to control the borders and deport illegal aliens and illegal immigrants. I know that not all illegal aliens and immigrants are criminals, some are good people, however, statistics show that most are uneducated and unskilled - it's not the upper crust of society that's sneaking across the borders. We have enough problems without scum like this spilling over at alarming rates from another country. Mr. President, please get this crap out of my backyard.

From Red Hot Cuppa Politics, "     Senate Sound And Fury, Signifying Not A Cotton-Pickin' Thing ...

I've always been mystified why Chuckie Hagel's referred to as a "Republican." Of course, lately, I think the Republican party's lost it's collective mind, so I guess Hagel's a fair representation of ... something.

From the WashingtonPost, reviewing Hagel's comments on CNN yesterday:
 

Red Hot Cuppa Politics, "MinuteMen Forge Ahead With Plans for Fence"

Despite President Bush's promise to (sort of) station the National Guard along the border, the MinuteMen will be breaking ground this weekend for their own fence. From the MinuteMen headquarters website: Minuteman Civil Defense Corps (MCDC) will be conducting a weekend border operation in Palominas, AZ that includes a border watch, Minuteman Border Fence Ground Breaking and repair of existing fence on the US Mexico border

From InMuscatine, "Why Don’t We Do This ?"

For a while now, I have been advocating we bring our laws in harmony with Mexico. For those who doubted the severity of Mexico’s laws as I represented them, please read this : Mexico Works to Bar Non-Natives From Jobs on Yahoo! News:

From Common Sense America, "In Quest of The Silver Lining"

Trying to find a glimmer of hope for America in the anti-American McCain/Kennedy Immigration Bill is kind of like trying to find Osama bin Laden in the Middle East - odds are slim to none. But occasionally, there is a bit of sunshine that peeks through the clouds. From The Washington Post Senate leaders predict final passage by week’s end. That would trigger a House-Senate conference committee charged with the arduous task of crafting a compromise between the two versions. No final bill can reach the president’s desk unless both chambers vote for it.

DeMediacratic Nation, "Exact Same Plan, Only Totally Different"

Democratice Senator, Diane Feinstein has a proposed immigration legislation that she believes would resolve the issue; especially the three tiered system being contemplated. As usual, another politician has come up with what they consider a better way to do it, but of course it relies upon estimates, illegal immigrant compliance and in the end grants amnesty; although we won't use that term.

**This was a production of The Coalition Against Illegal Immigration (CAII). If you would like to participate, please go to the above link to learn more. Afterwards, email the coalition and let
me know at what level you would like to participate.

Comments

[FrauBudgie]

Too funny!!! Thanks, the issue does get a little too intense at times ...

[Blandly Urbane]

I noticed that you got a triple trackback from my site. Sorry about that, I only submitted it once at haloscan and it got hung up. I knew enough from past experience to not submit it again.