Whitney Houston divorces Bobby Brown, Osama gets sick and dies

After hearing the rumors today that Osama Bin Laden might be very ill or even dead, the reasons for his illness/death became evident. It was not the cause of typhoid fever, but the fact that finally his one true love, Whitney Houston, was divorcing her husband Bobby Brown. Osama just couldn't handle his joy and excitement over the news and took to his sick bed.

Osama has revealed to his whore slave concubine that he wanted to have Bobby Brown killed and take Whitney for his own, perhaps buy her a mansion where they both could live happily ever after. Ahh, the dreams of a madman...

"Bin Lovin' " via King of Zembla has the scoop:

. . . is but one of the fascinating fun facts to be gleaned from Diary of a Lost Girl, an autobiographical work by Kola Boof, whose varied resume includes stints as a staff writer on Days of Our Lives and, for several months in 1996, as mistress to the aforementioned O. bin Laden. [snip]

He would humiliate me by making me dance naked. It was such a strange thing, because for the most part he believed music was evil. If a guest at the estate played music, he would cover his ears until the "poison" was silenced. But other times he would become this devout party boy who wanted to hear Van Halen or some B-52's. [snip]

"Why do you wear your hair braided?" he asked.

"Because my braids are beautiful," I replied.

Osama said only monkeys braid their hair. He told me that the singer Whitney Houston was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen and that she never wore her hair braided. "I want you to fix your hair like hers from now on," he said. "I can't put my fingers through it when it's braided" . . . .

Osama kept coming back to Whitney Houston. He asked if I knew her personally when I lived in America. I told him I didn't. He said that he had a paramount desire for Whitney Houston, and although he claimed music was evil, he spoke of someday spending vast amounts of money to go to America and try to arrange a meeting with the superstar. It didn't seem impossible to me. He said he wanted to give Whitney Houston a mansion that he owned in a suburb of Khartoum . . . . Whitney Houston's name was the one that would be mentioned constantly. How beautiful she is, what a nice smile she has, how truly Islamic she is but is just brainwashed by American culture and her husband -- Bobby Brown, whom Osama talked about having killed, as if it were normal to have women's husbands killed.

The divorce could just be a rumor, but here are Bobby Brown's own words:

The 36-year-old star - who in 2003 was accused of beating Whitney - was reportedly flirting with a group of women at a show by girl group SWV, in Connecticut, when one of them asked: "What's up with your wife?"

Brown - who has a 12-year-old daughter, Bobbi Kristina, with pop diva Whitney - reportedly replied: "We ain't together no more. We're getting a divorce." source

Now wouldn't that be a shame if the divorce was just a rumor? Maybe the media should have printed this information long ago and we could have been rid of the tall one much sooner. Now my mind can't escape thoughts of who al-Zawahiri might be dreaming about? Any ideas???

More at The Reid Blog and Cobb: Tuesday's Children
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Linked with:
bin Laden Dead? from Cop the Truth
The Median Sib wishes he had suffered more, if reports of his death are true.
Right, Wing-Nut, Wither Osama?
Right Wing Sparkle says "Again?"
Living in a cave has it's downside, via Red Hot Cuppa Politics
The Political Pit Bull says "Bottom line now, dubious, at best"
Politechnical Institute, "Just like Zarqawi, Osama’s gotta meet his maker sometime." AJStrata says...
Private Pigg of Public Figures Beware, "I'm sure it will turn out to be false."

Comments

[Debbie]

Generals on Fox News answred that very question this morning. They say it is an urban legend, they do not think he has any kidney problems.

[Thomas Hamilton]

It has been an amazement to me how Osama has been around all this time going from cave to cave wagging a dialysis machine. If he truly has dialysis dependent renal failure he would need to do this 3 times a week which would require the machine, lots of supplies, and the occasional services of a nephrologist.

I just don't get it!

[Debbie]

FrauBudgie, I'm beginning to think it may be propaganda put out by Osama to get the heat off him for a while. Who knows. It would be nice if he is alive, if he would pop his ugly head up so we can shoot it.

[FrauBudgie]

Heh! What a fun connection, thanks for that image ...

Hope this rumor pans out, don't you?

[massachusetts republican]

B Brown has done alot of bad things. NONE and I mean NONE are up there with what he did to his kid. Whitney, did ya ever tell that dead beat dad to pay up?

IF and obl is gone I hope that a new ride opens in hell just for him.