Liagra

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Liagra for Left’s Premature Evaluation

On Saddam’s Weapons of Mass Destruction

Well, here we go again with another epidemic of Premature Evaluation by the left and the Dems. Well, if you find yourself suffering from this very embarrassing condition, conservative truth seekers are glad again to provide you with that treatment that gets the old reason circulating again in that most vital and sensitive of all human organs, the human brain. Why, with a few doses of Liagra (pronounced “Lie-agra”), you will not only be back to your old self, but your intellect will actually soar to new heights.

Now, if you are like a lot of those exposed to the left who are suffering from Premature Evaluation, you may be wondering exactly how Liagra can accomplish such amazing results on wimpiness and self-loathing caused by the Democrats and the left. Well, it is so simple that it is a marvel to see when Liagra begins to bring the vitality back to your thinking response system.

How Liagra Cures Premature Evaluation

To understand how Liagra works, you first must understand the source of your impotent mental functioning: the lies of the left restrict your mental info circulation through clogging intellectual passageways with clots of clichés and impacted platelets of knee-jerk reactions. This is counteracted when Liagra does a search and destroy mission on the left’s lies that are hiding and accumulating like little time bombs in the idea circulation system that pumps up your intellect.

Yes, Liagra seeks those lies and surrounds them with facts. Then those facts are set free by Liagra, and before your very eyes the clots of clichés and impacted platelets of reactions are pulverized and filtered from the body through the cerebral kidneys. And almost instantly, the ideas begin to flow through your cerebral cortex at a pace that is hard to comprehend. Suddenly, your intellect rises to new levels, you can see things you have never seen before, and life and this great nation again look like blessings to be celebrated.

But how does one know if he or she needs Liagra? What are the symptoms of Premature Evaluation? Well, here are just a few of the most prominent ones.

Some Of the Lies Sought Out and Destroyed by Liagra

1- The first symptom of Premature Evaluation is that you believe, “If no WMD’s are EVER found in Iraq, that means there were none.” Only victims of Premature Evaluation could actually believe those million Iranians and over a hundred thousand Kurds killed by Saddam were destroyed by pixie dust. It is transparent to virtually every fool (except for acute sufferers of Premature Evaluation) that the well-documented evidence of the weapons means the WMD’S WERE there, regardless of where they now are.

But never fear. Liagra will surround the lies of the left with the lists of Saddam’s WMD’s catalogued by the U.N. after the Gulf War in 1991, admitted to by Saddam, and confirmed by the Clinton administration and the congress in 1998. Almost instantly, you will feel and increase in the idea flow in your intellectual organs

2- The second symptom of Premature Evaluation is that it seems credible to you that, “The mission under U.N. Security Resolution 1441 was to find WMD’s of Saddam’s.” Liagra will surround this clotted cliché with quotes from the U.N. resolution itself showing that the challenge was not for the U.N. or U.S. to find weapons, but for Saddam to either turn over the weapons or provide evidence concerning exactly how he had destroyed these known weapons. His failure to turn over such information, even if he had destroyed all the weapons, justified the war.

And when Liagra destroys this imbedded mass of lies, you will be freed to actually question: “If Saddam had not WMD’s, or if he did destroy the known stockpiles, why on earth would he withhold this vital information that would have prevented his being driven from power?” And you will be able to feel the stirrings of a renewed vitality when you confidently assert, “That just does not make sense!”

3- The Bush administration falsified or distorted the significance of intelligence to make the threat of WMD’s seem more threatening than was supported by the facts. Liagra will surround these platelets of knee jerk reactions and nuke them with quotes from Bill Clinton, Tom Daschle, Dick Gephardt, other Democratic congressmen, and U.N. authorities on the existing WMD’s known since 1991 to have been held and on those WMD’s being developed by the Saddam regime.

4- Our failure to find Saddam’s WMD’s in two months (while simultaneously trying to restore order and infrastructure to a primitive third world nation that never had much infrastructure in the first place) means there are none there. Liagra will seek, find, and squeeze that absurdity. And it will pulverize it with the idea that our failure to discover Saddam thus far does not mean he never existed. And then this stupid idea will be dissolved by logic into the idea stream that carries it away to the idea kidney that will dump it out onto the refuse heap of history.

5- If NO WMD’s are found in Iraq in the foreseeable future, this means the Bush administration needs to give some answers about the security information they had concerning Saddam’s WMD’s. Liagra will make it clear that Saddam’s WMD’s are so well established in fact that our lack of finding them does not raise the illogical question, “How were we so wrong about Saddam’s WMD’s?” but rather raises the logical and critical question to international security, “What has happened to them?” which is the very question that was presented to Saddam in U.N. resolution 1441, but never answered.

Soon after that question occurs to the Liagra patient who has been cured of his Premature Evaluation, another question will push his intellect to heights he never thought possible before, and he will quit asking, “How can we use this situation to hurt the President?” and instead will begin to ask, “What threats are posed by the missing WMD’s and how can we protect our nation from them?”

6- This time that the Democrats and the left attack the President, they know what they are doing. Liagra will clear up your mental functioning to such a degree that you will be freed to thrust forward the intellectual question, “What is it going to do to the little remaining credibility of the Dems and the left when their Premature Evaluations are made widely known by evidence that will eventually surface about what became of Saddam’s WMD’s?” It could even cause you to wonder, “What if the President does know where the WMD’s are and is just waiting until the most effective time in silencing his enemies to disclose those weapons?”

And you could even be stimulated to consider, “That is going to be one embarrassing day, whenever it comes, for the Dems when their Premature Evaluations are revealed to everyone! Whew!! I am SO glad I took my Liagra and avoided being humiliated with them!”

--Don Crawford, Host
The FLIPSIDE Talk Show, KJCE 1370 AM, Austin
You can contact Don at www.flipsideshow.com